Life By The Ifs…

There are times where I sit down and think Sean, whatcha doing in life? I’ll stay up trying to finish these poems by midnight. I feel I got a lot weight on my shoulders, but that’s just from my family. I’m learning to discipline myself and make sure I sprout out to everything I can be. Itcanbejessee so why not make it so? Being a role model to younger kids, just trying to give them something to follow. Support from my family and the church, I ain’t the type to let ’em down. I don’t like the thought of disappointing the closest ones around.

Maybe I got something going for me, got something with these words. Got a bigger purpose so you know I’m trying to be heard. I got people to believe in me, but they’re not all in my home town. I write so you can see the inside, cause not everything is important that surrounds. I hate letting people down, including myself. My shoulders get weak but I don’t often like to ask for help. Thats not the best quality to have, but I’ve been proven different. When I was younger I made bad decisions but now my choice making is deliberate.

Listen, I don’t have fans or whatever y’all wanna call it. I have supporters and people there to catch me when I’m falling. But I got times where I question, who’s happiness is more important theirs or mine? It’s just a straight mental battle and unlike the App Store I can’t cut the vine. Like I wanna be happy, and no one knows your true happiness but you. But if I screw up, and can’t get outta of a situation besides God who else is there to look to? Like I wanna be happy, and I want my friends and family to be happy too. They gave me the response, “regardless of what you do, we will be happy for you”IMG_3202

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s