Woke up this morning in my feelings. Tried to contain, but my emotion hit the ceilings. What is a villain? Nah, scratch that what is a hero. What can they do to make our problems zero. Will they help make a difference, will they save somebody’s life. Will they gain the respect that they need, or will they just die. See I don’t understand, we wait til they gone to show them respect. That can’t be me, cause I don’t think I’ve earned anybody’s yet. I don’t want that to be the case for me, we’ve had a lot of people die legends that no one even sees. How much did yall respect Michael Jackson before he died? How much respect you give Derrick Rose cause he’s out of his prime?
I’m not begging for respect, cause it’s earned; not given right? I just thought I could earn some through these emotions that I write. Maybe I was wrong, maybe y’all won’t ever respect me. Maybe you some bad parents that will always neglect me. I can’t stand it, you really don’t even read these writings. Trying to tell me how good these are but honestly you don’t even see this lighting. That’s the biggest fear of mine, no respect until I’m dead. I’m not positive people will remember these poems while I’m laying on my death bed. So I write to make sure they will eventually hear me out. I just want to be heard, I don’t have to be someone you care about.
I’m praying that they will cause I’ve tried to give myself that label. “Sean you seem to always write about you praying,” that’s right cause my prayer life that stable. God gave me this purpose and I’m just trying to fulfill it. The only time I’ll gain respect from this is when you really feel it. I’ve learned growing up that no one respects you unless you are good at what you do. So I studied poetry and lyrics to learn how to write to see if that statement was true. If I’m being honest, some people won’t ever respect you cause they see you’re doing well. Look at what Tom Brady is doing in the NFL. Yeah, sometimes people will bend the rules to get where they are now. I can’t say I’ve did that, it’s just been me writing so I hope respect isn’t far now.